Today is the first day of school. I know this to be a fact. First, I noticed there were a lot of cars outside my home. Cars filled with excited parents dropping of their excited kids. This is the first day of school. I then noticed the buses had gotten back to their usual schedule. Gone was the ten minute waiting time and back were the crowded buses filled with kids with backpacks. Today is the first day of school. Take it this wouldn't had been enough to convince me, I needed only to open Facebook to see that today truly is the first day of school. There they were, all smiling and looking happy. Kid after kid after kid. Endless amount of photos, preferably edited on Instagram to give it some edge, of kids with backpacks on their way to school. Today is the first day of school.
For quite some time, I've been wondering about this phenomenon. Some young parents are posting endless amounts of pictures of their babies. Not to say (some) of these kids aren't cute, but how would you react if your baby pictures were online? Or perhaps that picture of you when you were twelve, with that hideous shirt your mum made you were. And those braces. God, I wish I could erase the picture from my head, now I have to erase it from Facebook too? Needless to say, it is everyone's choice to put online about themselves what they please, but your kids? Are you sure you want to document Everything for Everyone to see? I have also noticed that sometimes one picture is not enough. Instead, you do a collage of many pictures. How cute.
Because I Didn't Get It The First Time.
Now before everyone goes all crazy on me and starts calling me a child hater, let me clarify that the same thing applies for cats and dogs and other animals you feel the acute need to post pictures of. There. I've said it. So now you can call me a child AND an animal hater. Whoopyfuckingdoo.
Now I can hear your rage all the way through the megabytes of the Internet, let me assure you. So before you call the cops on me, let me play your part for a while. Because frankly, I'm just a girl with no kids and no pets. My life must be pretty empty, which is why I love making fun of all the people that actually have a relationship. Or kids. Or pets. Or all of the previous. Sure, I can understand this argument. My life is filled with nights spent alone in bed, valentines days without love and new years without kisses. I'm alone.
It is rather interesting, if you think about it, the word single. What does the word really tell you? According to wikipedia (which I might add is the only true form of knowledge these days), single means "one in number". I agree, I am one in number. It also means "not married". Right you are wikipedia. I am not married. Single also means "not divided in parts". Well, this is a given. I am not divided in parts and would think anyone who is, has bigger problems then being single. Single is also "a type of release, typically a song recording of fewer tracks than an LP record or an album". For example, Beyonce has a single called Single Ladies (put a ring on it). I like the lyrics of this single:
Deep.
One of my favourite expressions in Finnish is jäädä yksin. This translates into being left alone (not in a positive way). It works well in English too. People are left, or dumped. That's even better. Dumped. Once you've been Dumped, you are single. You are left alone.
Alone.
Wikipedia, however, doesn't agree with us there. Wikipedia doesn't think single means alone. So why do we? I find it funny that the normal way to live a life is to find a person to share it with, get married, have kids and then post it all on Facebook. Happily ever after (because your relationship status does say married, after all). Being single, or not married (as if you need to be married to not be single), seems to be some kind of failure. Some kind of proof that you are not good enough. Some kind of proof that you are not wanted. You are single, therefore you are alone. A life filled with nights spent alone in bed, valentines days without love and new years without kisses.
I have never understood this equation. Regardless of the relationship I've been in, I must say I've never felt so blessed with the people around me as during this single part of my life. (notice the use of the word single, referring to a particular time in my life, not to my relationship status) We are raised to think the right path is that of kids and marriage. Now we are also expected to "make it official". No baby is born without a status update, no marriage ceremony carried out without a relationships status, no new puppy without a photo. One thing is lacking, though. Were are the pictures of a bleeding heart, the posts of disappointment, the true emotions that everyone deals with, but no one wants to fucking talk about?
I say, to hell with kids and marriage, to hell with cute posts of babies and puppies. Live your life the way you please, not the way you should. And not the way that looks good on Facebook.
I am single.
I am not married.
I am one in number.
But I am not alone.
And FYI, before you actually take everything I write seriously, I don't hate cats. I don't hate dogs. I don't hate kids. I don't hate relationships. I love all of these things. I just hate people posting about them.
 |
| Wait, what is today again? |
For quite some time, I've been wondering about this phenomenon. Some young parents are posting endless amounts of pictures of their babies. Not to say (some) of these kids aren't cute, but how would you react if your baby pictures were online? Or perhaps that picture of you when you were twelve, with that hideous shirt your mum made you were. And those braces. God, I wish I could erase the picture from my head, now I have to erase it from Facebook too? Needless to say, it is everyone's choice to put online about themselves what they please, but your kids? Are you sure you want to document Everything for Everyone to see? I have also noticed that sometimes one picture is not enough. Instead, you do a collage of many pictures. How cute.
Because I Didn't Get It The First Time.
 |
| This is me. Can you see me? Can you see all these pictures of me? Do you get it? It's me! |
Now before everyone goes all crazy on me and starts calling me a child hater, let me clarify that the same thing applies for cats and dogs and other animals you feel the acute need to post pictures of. There. I've said it. So now you can call me a child AND an animal hater. Whoopyfuckingdoo.
Now I can hear your rage all the way through the megabytes of the Internet, let me assure you. So before you call the cops on me, let me play your part for a while. Because frankly, I'm just a girl with no kids and no pets. My life must be pretty empty, which is why I love making fun of all the people that actually have a relationship. Or kids. Or pets. Or all of the previous. Sure, I can understand this argument. My life is filled with nights spent alone in bed, valentines days without love and new years without kisses. I'm alone.
 |
| Alone |
It is rather interesting, if you think about it, the word single. What does the word really tell you? According to wikipedia (which I might add is the only true form of knowledge these days), single means "one in number". I agree, I am one in number. It also means "not married". Right you are wikipedia. I am not married. Single also means "not divided in parts". Well, this is a given. I am not divided in parts and would think anyone who is, has bigger problems then being single. Single is also "a type of release, typically a song recording of fewer tracks than an LP record or an album". For example, Beyonce has a single called Single Ladies (put a ring on it). I like the lyrics of this single:
Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you should've put a ring on it
Don't be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you should've put a ring on it
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Deep.
One of my favourite expressions in Finnish is jäädä yksin. This translates into being left alone (not in a positive way). It works well in English too. People are left, or dumped. That's even better. Dumped. Once you've been Dumped, you are single. You are left alone.
Alone.
Wikipedia, however, doesn't agree with us there. Wikipedia doesn't think single means alone. So why do we? I find it funny that the normal way to live a life is to find a person to share it with, get married, have kids and then post it all on Facebook. Happily ever after (because your relationship status does say married, after all). Being single, or not married (as if you need to be married to not be single), seems to be some kind of failure. Some kind of proof that you are not good enough. Some kind of proof that you are not wanted. You are single, therefore you are alone. A life filled with nights spent alone in bed, valentines days without love and new years without kisses.
 |
| In 2011 it became official, Mark Zuckerberg changed his relationship status to "In a Relationship". <3 |
I have never understood this equation. Regardless of the relationship I've been in, I must say I've never felt so blessed with the people around me as during this single part of my life. (notice the use of the word single, referring to a particular time in my life, not to my relationship status) We are raised to think the right path is that of kids and marriage. Now we are also expected to "make it official". No baby is born without a status update, no marriage ceremony carried out without a relationships status, no new puppy without a photo. One thing is lacking, though. Were are the pictures of a bleeding heart, the posts of disappointment, the true emotions that everyone deals with, but no one wants to fucking talk about?
I say, to hell with kids and marriage, to hell with cute posts of babies and puppies. Live your life the way you please, not the way you should. And not the way that looks good on Facebook.
I am single.
I am not married.
I am one in number.
But I am not alone.
And FYI, before you actually take everything I write seriously, I don't hate cats. I don't hate dogs. I don't hate kids. I don't hate relationships. I love all of these things. I just hate people posting about them.
